Is Your 3 Year Old Plus Not Potty Trained Yet?

Once children reach 3 years of age, parents find themselves in a really bad situation if the child isn’t potty trained. As the schools or preschools have a policy that children should be potty trained for them to get the admission in the school. This puts a lot of pressure on the parents as well as kids to be potty trained before this stage.

If your child has not yet reached the potty trained stage then all I can say is do not despair. You would need lots of patience in order to get your child through this hurdle successfully. First of all find out if your child is constipated, I have seen lots of cases amongst my friends wherein the child is happy using the potty for wee wee but not the other part. Well, one of the major reasons for this could be that your child is constipated. So check his or her diet to make sure your child is getting enough fiber in his meals. Also make sure he or she drinks lots of water so that it helps him digest the food that he or she is eating.

If the constipation problem still persists then take your child to the doctor to make sure he or she doesn’t require medical attention. If your child is not constipated but still will not use potty, then the issue lies with their perception of the potty time. Try to see from their point of view what happens during the time they are sitting on a potty. Are you angry at your child and do they get scolded for not doing it while they are sitting on a potty, or are you constantly nagging behind them to use the potty. The pressure might be making the potty time as not pleasant in the child’s eyes so try to make this time as pleasant as possible for them. Give them something to look forward to, like a star chart or a candy or even a trip to the park or a favorite tv show etc. It could be anything that you can fit in your lifestyle, but this would make them see potty time as something to gain from instead of a time when they get bored or get scolded.

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Also the times when you feel frustrated because your child does it in his pants just after coming out from the potty room, take a deep breath and tell yourself that this is by no means your child’s way of making you mad. They are not doing this purposely, either they are not realizing yet how to hold their bowels till they reach the potty or they just might be feeling more comfortable doing it in the pants compared to the potty. Check to make sure the potty you have chosen for your child is comfortable enough for him or her. Investing in a good potty helps as this will make sure your child would pick up the potty training concept more easily.

My son took his own time learning this skill but you know what even through all the frustration, I knew that I wanted him to pick this skill up at his own time, when he feels comfortable. Please do not compare your child with your friend’s child who was potty trained when they were 18 months or even younger. All I can say is this comparing will not help in any way. Every child is different. They have their unique sense of everything. So why compare two totally different individuals? Yes, thats what they are, two completely different people. We do not like being compared with our friends do we, then why do this to our children?

If your child finds it difficult to learn to be potty trained then sit with him or her, talk to your child about what they find difficult, read them a story about potty training (you will get some good books on potty training in your local library), sing him songs and add potty training in it somehow. And when he or she finally does make an effort to sit on a potty for a while or do their business in it, make sure you praise them a lot. Do not say Good boy or a Good girl as that means, they are not good enough when they are not doing that activity, instead praise them for their ability to sit for such a long time or for understanding how to use the potty. I also told my son my story as a child (I made this part up) and told him how mommy took lots of time to understand it but how my little champion mastered it so soon. This helped him feel so good about himself that he would go and sit on a potty just to hear me tell him that or some other story on potty training.

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Finally, make sure you look at this as a skill that your child is going to learn and you are his or her guide in this wonderful process. So if you get angry then he or she doesn’t have any help whatsoever to achieve his or her goals. If we do not respect and stand for our child in their successes as well as failures then who will? Teach your child that its fine to fail as they are going to learn not only potty training but also this truth about life early on in their life. Everyone fails at some point or the other and it’s fine to fail. You just try harder the next time when you are ready. This will make them come to you if they are having any problems in the future too. Isn’t that what we all want? That our children should trust and come to us if they ever need our help, so teach them that. Only you can do so.